Is it just me, Drew Sharp, or is every sports article you write intended to hurt people. You're not a sports writer, you're a sports critic with a shitty attitude. Is it in your contract to be mean? I need to know.

Just once, Mr. Sharp, just one time, I'd like to see you write about something you support or some sports figure you like. In your latest article, you rip Chris Webber. I then went through your article archive. You rip the Tigers. You rip the Lions. You rip the fans of my great hometown and I've had just about enough of it. You are a bitter man, Mr. Sharp, and there's only one way to stop you. I'm gonna take your job.

It may take a couple years, but be looking over your shoulder, because as Lee Corso says, "He's a coming". I'm gonna write every day and send my greatest sports masterpieces to your editor. I'm gonna hone my stylistic prose and create a form that makes other sports writers wince in fear. Maybe not Bill Simmons or Mitch Albom, 'cause they're like the bomb and stuff, but like the average writers and hacks. There will be so much buzz around my writing, larger papers and magazines will want me, but because of you, the only place I'll consider is the Free Press. And when I get there, piece after piece will be written about promise and hope for the great sports teams of the town I love. And it'll eat away at you, Mr. Sharp, oh, how it'll eat away at you.

I respect you Drew Sharp. You don't get to where you are without writing like a motherfuckin genius. I only wish you would get a grip and start enjoying what you have and what you're doing, 'cause it seems like you hate the D and everything its sports teams stands for. You have one of the greatest jobs in all the world, Mr. Sharp, and if you don't start treating it with some respect, I'll make good on my promise.

Regretfully out to end your career in Detroit,

Editor, Solotarian Views